There’s a type of erotic fiction that I’d like to write, but I’m having a hard time making it work. I’ve long been interested in why we’re wired the way we are, why are we turned on by certain things/situations and the evolution of our fetishes. But I’m not thinking of it in any kind of clinical sense. The idea I have is to write an erotic short story that not only captures a character and his/her kink, but also gives some sense of where that kink came from.

 

One of the big problems I’m having with this idea is, the origin of a fetish often happens long before we tun 18. Our sexual wiring starts when we start, but to explore the things that happen as a child in a piece of erotica without being creepy is difficult.  If I strip away all that is erotic from the part of the story that takes place before the age of consent and turn on the smut in the second part it seems like two separate stories.

 

Here’s a couple of paragraphs that I was quite happy with. Lisa’s ‘oral fixation’ started when she was about 7 and her dentist, who looked like an old walrus and smelled of Old Spice and pipe tobacco pulled out a couple of her baby teeth. When she was 14 her dentist looked like David Cassidy. The Partridge Family was all the rage and Lisa had a huge crush on him. Neither of these men ever did anything inappropriate to Lisa, but a sexual connection was made in her mind. My attempts to combine those to parts in a way that flows and is erotic, but not creepy have failed.

 

Here’s another example. When Mini was 6 or 7 years old I took him to a local water park one summer afternoon. The park was crowded with kids splashing in the water and parents sitting in the shade around the sides. I noticed a little girl (maybe 4 or 5) sitting on one of the water jets. She was just sitting there rocking back and forth with a big smile on her face, totally unaware of all the other kids playing around her. I’d love to start a story from that point. Maybe that was the first time she noticed how nice that zone could feel. Maybe her mother notices what she’s doing and makes a huge public scene. Maybe that’s the start of a being an exhibitionist… A powerful image with lot’s of possibilities, but how to use it without being creepy is difficult.

 

♀ & I were talking about my wiring the other night. When I was in grade 4 I had a teacher who was verbally and pyscologically abusive . I had troubles eating and sleeping, the skin peeled off my hands and eventually I was removed from her classroom. When I was 10, my uncle married his first wife. From the time they got married until I was about 14 she took great delight in tormenting me. She believed I wasn’t masculine enough. She’d slap me around, pin me to the ground and tickle or pinch me until I wet myself then tease me about getting beat up by a girl. I don’t remember either of these women with anything resembling fondness, but when I look back on my dating history, I’ve always been attracted to dominate women.  I get that context is everything. I understand that tormenting a child like that is wrong, but tormenting an adult sissy like that is hot. I’d just like to figure out how to combine those two things into a single story.

 

 

Cheers,

♀ & sss

We went to another Exploratorium last night…the first in the new location (now with a functioning washroom). Before I tell you about all the activities WE tried, I’ve gotta say Jennifer cleans up nicely! The first few times we met her she was preggers, then just a few weeks after she’d delivered the Pickle and the last time we saw her she was hooked up to a pump. Last night she was wearing a very nice low-cut dress and sexy shoes and she looked rested and she looked great.

 

The first thing I did (in my new pink panties) was to get tied up by a Pleasure Artist.  He had ♀ do the last few knots and once I was all trussed up she took great delight in tickling and pinching me. She also encouraged anyone else to come and do the same. Later when I was untied, ♀ said she was getting concerned because my hands were turning blue, but I didn’t mind being tied up like that and being tormented by ♀ wasn’t so bad either.

 

Next we did a couples yoga session. That was a really big eye-opener. First she did an assessment of both of us and it turns out ♀ is really quite flexible and just needs to work on maintenance. I on the other hand have serious flexibility/mobility issues that will only get worse and could lead to big problems if I don’t address them soon. She recommended twice weekly yoga for me.  ♀ & I were thinking that might be something fun to do together. Next we were introduced to 3 sexual positions we hadn’t tried before. Watching yoga can be sexy, but I had no idea it could be sexy for us, if you know what I mean. We tried one of the positions when we got home. ♀ was on her side with one leg pulled up, I knelt behind her and straddled the other leg. Either entrance was accessible (I chose pussy) she could touch her clit and we had a visual connection. I don’t think we had the position quite right, but I’m sure we’ll try it again. The one I’m really looking forward to trying is she sits in a lotus position, I sit on her feet and she can give me a blow-job and finger fuck my ass. Gets me excited just thinking about it.

 

After that we tried silk scarf bondage. ♀ went first and I must admit that I was amazed that she tried it. She won’t even let me use the little velcro cuffs in our bedroom. Being restricted, giving up control is…difficult for her. The guy doing it was really nice and talked to her constantly while he was tying her and she really liked the feel of the silk. She also, admitted that even though she couldn’t escape she could still move her hands a bit in the scarves so it wasn’t as scary.  Her hands were tied behind her back and then he tied two more around her…just above and below her breasts. They sure looked yummy. I got tied-up after and it was a totally different sensation than the ropes (the silk really does feel nice) I could picture us doing that at home. I can’t see us ever trying the ropes at home.

 

It was ♀ who wanted to try caning next. I’ve spanked her with my hand and used a small flogger on her a couple of times with mixed results so I never would have guessed that was something she’d want to try. OK, it wasn’t so much the caning that got her to get completely naked on his bench, it was that she was very attracted to the man doing the caning. In fact we had only been at the Lounge for about 15 minutes and she had him fondling her breasts with a hand-held vibrator. The canes he used were not what I had pictured at all.  These were strands of ‘cane’ tied together at a handle. He made them himself and each one had a different size of cane in it. I tried to find pictures on-line, but haven’t been able to find any. Imagine floggers with different thicknesses of falls, but instead of leather, these were cane.  He started out with really thin ones and before he moved up to thicker ones, he’d sprinkle some powder on her and rub it in with his hands. It was so sexy watching him caress her back, ass, hips thighs, legs. We’ve talked lots about what might translate well from fantasy to reality…I’m pretty sure I would have enjoyed watching that go further.

Her back was a nice rosy-red when she was done and she was just so amazed at how relaxing it was. She really enjoyed it. I went next and the sensation was different than when I got flogged, but what was going on in my head was kinda the same…going to a different place sort of…it’s hard to explain. Honestly, what I enjoyed the most about it was how musical it was. He really got a rhythm going and it was almost hypnotic.

 

One of the things that has caused us trouble at the Lounge is when ♀ feels like I’m not listening to her. I get caught up in the moment and I think I’m just being encouraging and she takes it as being pressured. She knows that there’s a fine line between the two and that depending on mood and circumstances that line moves so unless I’m being especially pig-headed she doesn’t get really pissed with me when I cross it, but still, it’s a challenge. There were two examples of that last night with two different results…

 

There was a mummification booth set up and we’d watched several women get wrapped in shrink-wrap then tickled and flogged and spanked. Of all the things we didn’t try, that was the one she watched the most. Even though I know being restricted like that would be a challenge for her I sort of thought she might be coaxed. Then the guy who was helping Jennifer came by and suggested we try getting done together. Neither of us had even thought of that possibility and I had the impression that she was leaning towards doing it. If she were to try, it would have been with me but she really didn’t want to and the combination of me saying ‘yeah lets’ and the other guy saying it would be fun…♀ felt like we were ganging up on her. Rather than stewing about it and letting it derail our evening, ♀ took me aside and told me she didn’t feel like I was listening to her and then we moved on.  That was a huge accomplishment for us.

 

Shortly after that Jennifer suggested we try the erotic kissing booth…as a couple (something we hadn’t considered). She reads our blog and knows playing with others is something we’ve often fantasized about, but… Jennifer said that until you try something you really don’t know. She told ♀ to set the boundaries…no kissing on the mouth for instance. She told her the Cheryl would be sure to listen and respect ♀ wishes. Sissy or not, I’m still a hetero male and I really wanted to see ♀ with a woman..funny, it never occurred to me that I’d be getting kissed. Anyway, ♀ of course knew my feelings on the subject, but she wasn’t so sure. We were fighting the clock a bit by this time. Should she, shouldn’t she? Finally, she said yes. The three of us sat of a couch with ♀ in the middle. It was a little awkward at first because ♀ couldn’t really say what her boundaries were. I was the one who said no kissing on the mouth and the way we were sitting made it clear ♀ was to be the centre of attention. Cheryl started off  kissing ♀ neck and nibbling on her ear. I did the same on the other side and started fondling her breasts. I found out later that my kisses and caresses were sort of over powering compared to what Cheryl was doing and I really was trying to be gentle. After a couple of minutes of that, ♀ lifted my chin up from between her breasts just in time for me to see ♀ turn her head and start kissing Cheryl on the mouth. That probably sounds like a really minor thing, but it was incredibly erotic to see and not something I will soon forget.

 

And then just like that, 3 hours were gone and it was time to go home. I could probably write another post just as long as this one telling you about all that we’ve talked about since leaving the Lounge, but it’s getting late and I need to make breaky for my sleeping Goddess and get my own sorry ass to bed.

 

Cheers,

♀ & sss

So did you hear the Olympics were here? No, seriously…right here. The torch went past our apartment two days before the Games started and past the bakery the day before that. I didn’t see it at either place, but still…it was right here.

 

We didn’t go into town to see any of it live, but we watched more coverage than I had ever watched before and I have to admit I was, for the most part, impressed. When it comes to showing our national pride, we Canucks are usually a lot more reserved than our southern cousins, but these past two weeks have been one big ol’ Canadian love fest, eh.

 

VANOC and the IOC have a iron grip on all the media from the games so I can’t actually post any of the things that were hi-lights for me, but these few videos should give you the gist of it…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cheers,

♀ & sss

My Uncle sent this to me…

Actual letter to the Canadian Passport office

Dear Mr. Minister,

I’m in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.

How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number and knows

That I bought a t.v. Cable from them back in 1997, and yet, the Federal

Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date.

For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand?

My birth date you have on my social insurance card, and it is on all the

Income tax forms I’ve filed for the past 30 years. It is on my health

Insurance card, my driver’s license, on the last eight goddamn passports

I’ve had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I’ve had to fill out

Before being allowed off the planes over the last 30 years, and all those

Insufferable census forms that are done at election times.

Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother’s name is

Maryanne, my father’s name is Robert and I’d be absolutely astounded if that

Ever changed between now and when I die!!!!!!

SHIT!

I apologize, Mr. Minister. I’m really pissed off this morning. Between you

An me, I’ve had enough of this bullshit! You send the application to my

House, then you ask me for my fuckin’ address. What is going on? You have a

Gang of Neanderthal assholes workin’ there!

Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don’t want to dig up

Yasser Arafat, for shit sakes. I just want to go and park my ass on a sandy

Beach.

And would someone please tell me, why would you give a shit whether I plan

On visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do

Something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I’d sure as hell not

Want to tell anyone!

Well, I have to go now, ’cause I have to go to the other end of the city and

Get another fuckin’ copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of $60!!!

Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot to

Assist in the issuance of a new passport the same day??

Nooooo, that’d be too damn easy and maybe make sense. You’d rather have us

Running all over the fuckin’ place like chickens with our heads cut off,

Then find some asshole to confirm that it’s really me on the goddamn picture

- you know, the one where we’re not allowed to smile?!  (fuckin’ 

Morons)

Hey, you know why we can’t smile? We’re totally pissed off!

Signed - An Irate fucking Canadian Citizen.

P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting someone to

Confirm that it’s me? Well, my family has been in this country since 1776

When one of my forefathers took up arms against the Americans. I have served

In the military for something over 30 years and have had security clearances

Up the yingyang.

I was aide de camp to the lieutenant governor of our province for ten years

And I have been doing volunteer work for the RCMP for about five years.

However, I have to get someone ‘important’ to verify who I am - you know,

Someone like my doctor WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN COMMUNIST fucking CHINA

We went to the first ever Meet n Greet at the Libido Lounge last week.  I’m sure there must be days when it all seems overwhelming (12 week old baby, on-going health issues, Jennifer & Jason both working), but every time we go there’s more and more done and the new space is really starting to take shape.

 

As with Deviant Dining, there was no playing at the Meet n Greet, but the vibe was definitely sexier. We’d probably met or at least seen half of the other attendees before, but it was nice to actually talk to people and find out more about who they are, why they joined the lounge, their experiences to date or, if they were new like us, what they hope to get out of it…or maybe a better way to put that would be; what do they bring to the party. Everyone was really friendly and the conversations we were involved in felt easy and natural.

 

There was a guy wearing a kilt and ♀ wanted to know what he was wearing underneath and with a little help from Jennifer, she asked him (not much).  A woman showed us all her tattoos and her anal piercing. At the time all I could think of was ‘owch’, but later I wondered how she kept it clean while it was healing and just how painful was pooping? Maybe I’ll ask the next time I see her. Or not.

 

We also met a Bondage Master. I’m not certain that’s what he calls himself, but he does the bondage for Pinup-Bondage. I wasn’t sure if I was even really interested in bondage, but he was so enthusiastic that it was hard not to get excited about it. He explained that there’s no nudity or violence in his scenes. There’s no photo-shop and the backgrounds are very stark. The photos are all about the models and the pretty things they wear and of course the bondage. Also, every series of photos tells a story. I’ve really been enjoying looking at his website…even the free stuff is great. ♀ wants him to tie me up.

 

There was a woman selling Hanky Panky stuff.  We bought some very nice foot cream and have our eye on a few other goodies. The evening finished up with a Burlesque Dancer. She’s going to be offering classes that will include not only the dance, but also costume design and choreography.  ♀ has taken Belly Dance (fun) and Pole Dance (hard) so she should take Burlesque as well…dontchya think?

 

I had to go straight to work after we left the Longue so we didn’t have time to stop for our usual debriefing, but we did have some time while I drove ♀ to her car. She had a good time as well, but she did admit she was struggling with how she would react when I was with other women (like it is inevitable?).  I wrote her an email when I got home the next morning…

 

I am troubled that we are both feeling like the other person is not listening. There have been times when 1 or the other of us has felt that way, but I can’t recall a situation where we’re both feeling like that.
We’ve spent years exploring and developing the rules and boundaries of our particular dynamic. I am the happiest when you take charge and treat me like a sissy. I truly love when you think of new ways to assert yourself. I simply cannot wrap my mind around why you would think that we will need (or want?) to put all that aside. Pretending to not be us isn’t going to make either of us happy.
In all honesty, the only physical contact with another woman I can picture you allowing (in the beginning at least) would be things like brush and braid her hair, file and massage her feet, kiss her boots, serve her drinks and snacks or the scenario I described with a submissive female where I get him ready for you and she gets you ready for him…or  getting pegged… or put on one of those machines and getting milked…or you only allow me to have sex with you and my legs have to be spread or none of the above…maybe you just want me to be at your beck and call…or maybe the only contact you will allow on a particular night is preparing men for you or ‘forcing’ me to do things with another man…
If things evolved and sometime in the future you wanted me to actually have sex with another woman I would fully expect you to have strict rules about it…maybe things like no kissing or only if I have my legs spread or only if I’m blindfolded or tied up or whatever tickles your fancy at the time. (I would expect you to dictate the terms of engagement no matter who the person is…male, female, lounge member, friend)
This needs to be a positive experience for both of us and the only way I can see that happening is if you are in charge completely.
Â
I love you so much Dear. Please don’t ever forget that.

Cheers,

♀ & sss

It feels like a Chet Baker kind of V-Day this year…

 

 

I couldn’t decide so posted them both. Do you have a preference?

 

*If you start the instrumental version 5 seconds before the other, they actually match up quite well. It’s kind of a cool effect

 

Earlier this week, our friend C sent us a poem that her 17 yr old daughter wrote. I wasn’t going to post it here, but that was then and this is now and the darkness of it fits my mood.

 

 Valentine Poem

 

 

Valentine’s Day sure is dandy

It’s chock-full of heartbreak and candy!

Bleeding love and chocolate cremes

Strawberry swirls and ruined dreams

Those little chalky hearts that make your teeth crack

Long stemmed roses, and a knife in the back

The air is full of sweet coconut and fear

(I’m pretty happy I’m single this year.)

 

 

Please don’t think that I want to be single. It’s just been a tough week and I’m feeling like ummm just not very romantic.

 

Cheers,

 

sss

You know how some people are associated with ‘X’?  Like say the woman who gets a hummingbird or dragonfly or duck-billed-platypus or whatever tattooed on her ankle and then everyone thinks she must really like that and it’s the gift of choice and she ends up with so much of it people start thinking it’s an obsession and they buy even more of it for her.

 

Well ♀ is in that situation with Betty Boop and I think it might be my fault. We both like Betty Boop. She cute and flirty and fun, but I think I started it when I got this airbrush done at a Valentines dance a couple of years ago.

 

Now she has more Betty Boop stuff than you can shake a stick at. This is just a sample…

 

Is there something unusal that you’re associated with? We’d love to hear about it!

 

HHNT,

♀ & sss

 

PS: Just in case you’re not into the whole V-Day thing, Blue-Eyed Vixen had this to say

Just when I think the Writing Muse has left me forever, she comes back. But she’s a big tease. She gives me just enough inspiration to amuse the readers of somebody else’s blog.

 

I’ve been thinking about this post card from this weeks Post Secret

Do you think the deception really matters to either of them? Speaking as one who had many online relationships before I met ♀, I’d have to say as long as they both stay true to their character, than no, it doesn’t matter at all.

 

I must admit I don’t read Secrets of a Blue-Eyed Vixen every day (have you seen how big our blog-roll is?) so it is possible that she’s talked about cuckolding her hubby before and I missed it. I don’t think her hubby is quite as submissive as I am, but apparently the thought of being cuckolded has been a huge turn-on for him for a long time. Last week during a girls trip to Vegas, Vixen went from fantasy to reality. She writes about it here and here. What I found absolutely fascinating was her hubby’s comments on the posts. Whether it’s from the male or female point of view pretty much everything I’ve read about cuckolding has been fantasy,  like here at SSS, or very established cuckold relationships. It was so cool to read not only how Vixen felt about it, but also the internal conflict her hubby is having with it.

 

Speaking of internal conflicts, ♀ & I took another step towards getting more involved with the Libido Lounge.  We went to the Play Party Etiquette class on Sunday. Jennifer was amazing as always. I know I rave about her every time I mention her and if you know her, I’m preaching to the choir and if you don’t you’re probably saying ‘OK, we get it. she’s super-duper-awesome’.

 

Anyway, the class had tons and tonnes of information, ideas and suggestions. As with other visits to the Lounge, we stopped on the way home to debrief. We talked about what we learned, saw, felt, thought…

 

The class did what it was supposed to. There’s a couples only play party in a couple of weeks and we’re seriously thinking of attending. Before the class, we’d both said that was more than we were ready for. I think the apprehensions we still have are internal more than external. We both trust Jennifer and the people we’ve met so far have all been nice so we’re not really worried about being treated badly or being pressured to do things (or people) we don’t want to do.

 

One of the first things Jennifer said was to know your own boundaries, but ♀ pointed out that we’re still exploring so it’s really hard to say definitively this is in and that is out and in the heat of the moment when one or both of us are thinking with our little brains and not our big brains, it’s not hard to imagine things going sideways. We both know that experience will be the best teacher, but still, at this stage of our development it’s a little intimidating.

 

I know everyone reading this thinks I’m the one pushing to do more and more, but I have reservations as well. ♀ still has some body image issues, but seriously…long blond hair, big beautiful breasts, gorgeous hips, she’s approachable, has an infectious laugh..all she needs to do is wear something sexy and just be herself and even if she doesn’t actually play with anyone, the only way she wouldn’t have a good time would be if she was trying hard not to have a good time.

 

I, on the other hand…when we decided to join the lounge I told ♀ that I would be joining as a sissy. There really isn’t any point in going to events wearing one of my two pairs of boxers. We joined to meet like-minded people and to expand our horizons and ’sissy’ is definitely a part of that. I believe her when Jennifer says shame and ridicule aren’t allowed in, but a middle-aged guy in a pink baby-doll is (I think) more than just a little outside the box and yeah, it’s a bit intimidating.

 

We’re leaning towards going to the next play party in a couple weeks. Stay tuned!

 

Cheers,

 

♀ & sss

Yes, I know I haven’t been very consistent with the posts lately. I’ve been a 6 night/week kinda baker since before Christmas and we’ve been doing a lot of research into getting a side business up and running and ♀ started her 2nd level of sign language and we’ve just been busy.

 

Speaking of baking, I found this very cute costume at Lollipop Lingerie. It only comes in small and medium so we won’t be ordering it, but still..cute.

 

When I need to list my occupation for something I’ll often say Dough Surgeon. Some people question it, others (like the woman who did our mortgage) just put it in. I had a passport application rejected because of it and  Elections Canada  didn’t think much of it either. I was on Twitter a few days ago and Miss Teresa called me a Dough Sturgeon.

 

That reminded me of a funny story.  A few years ago ♀ took me to La Conner, Wa for a little R&R. If I remember correctly we had just served papers on my Ex and decided to skip the country for a couple of days. The first night we were there, we were having dinner at a little restaurant just down the street from the B&B we were staying at. It was a nice evening so we sat out on the patio. The dinner special was sturgeon, just brought in that morning and since I had never tried sturgeon before, I had to order it.

 

We had just started eating when another couple sat down at the table beside us. The woman was trying to decide if she should try the sturgeon (for the first time as well). I leaned towards  her and offered to let her try mine. She was surprised, but did try a bite. She agreed it was delicious. Then I announced in a very serious voice that in my country if a woman eats a man’s sturgeon she is considered to be his wife. I said I would allow her to finish her meal with her date, but after dinner she would need to leave with ♀ & I. She and ♀ and the waitress all laughed, but the guy didn’t think I was all that funny.

 

In other news, Mini (13) beat me bowling last week. It’s all down hill now.

 

♀ started her period 16 days after the last one ended. Not certain what that means. Perimenopause, perhaps?

 

 

A couple of nights ago, ♀ was teasing me with a small bullet vibrator (attached to a cord). She held it against different places to see what I like the best. She had lube on it and was holding it against the tip of my cock and then she slipped it inside. We were both pretty surprised when it slid in so easily.  ♀ was worried that it was going to hurt me, but I gotta tell you…it felt amazing. Incredibly intense. I’m curious to find out what would happen if she gave me an orgasm with it inside my cock. Do you think it would hurt? Would the bullet pop out like a champagne cork? Or would my penis swell up like a balloon?

 

 

I’ll be sure to let you know.

 

I guess that’s all for tonight.

 

Cheers

♀ & sss

Used book stores and lingerie stores are, without a doubt, my two biggest shopping weaknesses. I love shoe stores as well, but I’m usually able to resist the temptation to buy. Used books and lingerie seem like an odd combination…what can I say, I’m an odd guy. To be honest though, for a long time now, our lingerie shopping has just been for ♀. That’s perfectly fine. I love shopping for lingerie, even if it’s helping ♀ find pretty things. We still get panties for me, of course, but since I wear them every day I don’t really think of them as lingerie anymore.

 

We were in the mall last week and noticed the La Senza store was having a big renovation sale. We ended up leaving with 2 bra’s and 4 pair of panties for ♀, 2 baby-dolls with matching panties for me  and 3 pair of leggings (1 of them was leopard print) for us to share.

 

I hadn’t planned on getting anything for myself, but ♀ brought up a very good point. It’s hard to feel sexy if your clothes don’t fit. Maybe all women know this, but I don’t think most guys do. I’ve always been thin, but over the past 5 years I’ve put on a 20lb Buddha belly and so most of the ‘girly’ clothes we bought when we first started down this path are now to small.  She held the large up to me and thought they would probably fit. I still wasn’t sure. She pointed out the price (2/$25 ) and I really didn’t have a good argument for not getting them.

 

So Saturday night we went out for an early dinner and when we got home ♀ asked me to model 1 of my new outfits. She even got me to put my inserts in. And guess what? It fit and I felt pretty.

 

 

HHNT

♀ & sss

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